Tech Support Letter

Dear Tech Support,
Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of new space, valuable resources and monetary funds. No mention of this phenomenon was included in the product brochure.

In addition, Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other programs and launches during system initialization, where it monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Drunken Boys Night 2.5 and Saturday Football 5.0 no longer run, crashing the system whenever selected.

I cannot seem to keep wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run some of my other favorite applications. I am thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the uninstall does not work on this program.

Can you please help me!!!???

Thanks,

A Troubled User
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Dear Troubled User,

This is a very common problem men complain about, but is mostly due to a primary misconception. Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 with the idea that Wife 1.0 is merely a UTILITIES & ENTERTAINMENT program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and designed by its creator to run everything.

It is unlikely you would be able to purge Wife 1.0 and still convert back to Girlfriend 7.0. Hidden operating files within your system would cause Girlfriend 7.0 to emulate Wife 1.0 so nothing is gained. It is impossible to uninstall, delete, or purge the program files from the system once installed. You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is not designed to do this.

Some have tried to install Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0 but end up with more problems than the original system. Look in your manual under "Warnings- Alimony! /Child support!". I recommend you keep Wife 1.0 and deal with the situation.

I suggest installing background application program C:\YESDEAR to alleviate software augmentation. Having installed Wife1.0 myself, I might also suggest you read the entire section regarding General Partnership Faults (GPFs). You must assume all responsibility for faults and problems that might occur, regardless of their cause. The best course of action will be to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE. In any case avoid excessive use of C:\YES DEAR because ultimately you may have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the operating system will return to normal. The system will run smoothly as long as you take the blame for all the GPFs.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but very high-maintenance. Consider buying additional software to improve the performance of Wife 1.0. I recommend Flowers 3.1 and nothing less than Diamonds 2K. Do not, under any circumstances install Secretary with Short Skirt 3.3. This is not a supported application for Wife 1.0 and is likely to cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

Best of Luck,

Tech Support

Harry Potter

I have read each book. I have seen each movie. I love them all! I think that each one gets better than the last.

I know alot of people said that the newest movie was horrible. Get real, there is no way to put a 700+ page book into a 2 hr movie without having to cut a bunch of the details out. Unless each book was turned into a mini-series, there is no way that the details from each book could stay exactly as they are. I do agree that there are many details that were cut and are important to the story. What should have been cut? They had to cut something. Even though there are many details lacking, the newest movie Order of the Phoenix was Awesome! I loved it!

I cant wait for the last 2 books to become movies. I will be awaiting that. I also cant wait for the Harry Potter Encyclopedia. I am sure that will fill in alot of missing details. I am also sure that J.K. Rowling will be happy to get use of the notes and details that she didnt include in the books. I dont know how she does it, how she did it. But, I have to say Thank you JK Rowling. You have kept in under your spell since I discovered your books. My children as well as I have been completely swept away by Harry Potter and friends.